Mama Always Said...

"If you lie down with dogs you'll get up with fleas!"

One of the greatest expressions that have ever graced my ears! I couldn’t agree more, “If you lie down with dogs, you will wake up with fleas.”

*Lie Down-Not necessarily sleeping with, but also investing your time and energy into this person.
*Dogs- No good men, ain’t bout nothing women, irresponsible, selfish, ego-driven… click here for more examples.
*Wake up- To become physically and mentally alert to/ aware of…
*Fleas- Unwanted drama (what drama is wanted?), displeasing/ disturbing/ devastating emotions, or undesirable physical changes i.e. STIs/ STDs

On some conscious level we are all aware of the lesson behind this expression yet often we silence our logic and decide to act otherwise. Knowingly, opting to associate and interact with dogs is straight foolish!

We know this, yet there is a little voice of foolery in our minds (often confused with our heart) that is encouraging us to give them a chance… this could different… you can change them… it’s not that serious you are just friends…So we take a chance on them, then turn around and wonder why we now have fleas. As the definition states I am not specifically talking about STD’s, I mean we wonder why he is acting this way. What’s up with all of the drama? Why am I feeling so low? Confused?

Often we don’t recognize the dog beneath the sheep clothing and “lie down” unfortunately to wake up to some bull… Lesson learned.

I don’t want to limit this expression to romantic relationships; one could easily associate it with casual friendships. Those friends who choose to be involved in destructive activities, looks to attract drama, and any reason to douse an altercation with gasoline will suck you into their cycle of destruction.

Cut them off… You don’t need dogs in your life. Do something magnificent in your life and cut loose the people you know aren’t about shyt. I know I know... some dogs are so entertaining… they always answer when you’re up at 3am lonely as hell… they aren’t “bad” all the time… oh and you’ve known them forever so it would be janky if you just cut them loose like that. I know! I know!

Now pause for a second and quit making excuses- take a chance and do something for YOU.

Create a HEALTHY distance from people who are emotionally, spiritually, socially, and physically draining you, and work on strengthening the bonds with people who are emotionally, spiritually, socially, and physically fulfilling you.

This expression is definitely golden and should echo on for generations to come.

What really concerns me is do we really have to learn the hard way in order to truly learn this lesson?


LLnL said...

I don't ever rember thinking that I could change someone, but I always wanted to give them a chance. I did not think it was tright to judge a book by its cover, but I kept them at arms length (emtoionally, not physically). That way if they made a doggish move it did not hurt, at least I thought it didn't.

Starting up for a relationship that you have committed to not giving your whole self is a waist of time, why take yourself off the market for that. If a mna was going to chnage they won't if you don't make a stand against certain behavior, not trying to change them just being committed to ending things if they do something that you find disrespectful; leaving with no hurt feelings early on. If you suspect somone is a dog but don't know for sure, just postpone the physical intimacy until your are truly convinced.

If all else fails than just get a flea bath and move on. i really like your blog, I will definitely be back.

DiVA_La Reine said...

I really needed to read something like this. Glad I finally came to check out your blog. Think I'm going to like it here.

Certified Diva aka Chivonne said...

@LLnL I agree with you if you a skeptical about a person (whether or not they are a dog) don't compromise what youhold sacred for some that may be sex and it can be different things for others, nevertheless skepticism should warrant a moderate pace.

@Diva_La Reine thank you for joining us! I hope to see you around and please spread the word! Enjoy!